Bog standard reading

By: pixbyshumbles

Sep 24 2012

Category: September 2012

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We took a stroll down the bog today, our stretch, not the more exotic one to which we walk on a lightly tarmacadamed road (oh ye gods, the sophistication of it!). No, we thought we’d slum it today and walk through the muck track that runs through it.

A quiet perambulation for the most part, or it was until I spotted a suitcase lying artfully in the middle of the turf and decided to investigate. There it was, a retro 1960s style blue (slightly) ajar suitcase.

But it wasn’t alone.

Beside it, artfully placed it must be said, was a large battery  (a spam-tin shaped standy-up one), a gear stick jammed into the earth and, to complete the exhibition piece, a picture of some holy chap or other.

I was too chicken to open the case in case something might jump out, or worse, not jump out so I beat a hasty retreat and began to investigate the mountain of detritus beside it.

What a heap.

There was an electronic piano, CDs: Queen (gasp shock horror, off with their heads!) and David Gray (totally understandable of course), computer screens, old nappies and wellies. Somebody was evidently having a major clear out. While I was investigating this great manuscript (pictured) the intrepid explorer known as The Big Brown Bow-Wow made the biggeset score of all.

Half a Kit-Kat.

Yes, I know dogs shouldn’t eat chocolate but he’s never one to pass up an opportunity. Anyway, he reckons he’s immune.

He’s probably right, his late sister once polished off the bottom layer of a box of Milk Tray. Dirty little git, she’d have sold her soul for a day in Cadbury’s!

The great drooler has eaten worse (frequently) and he’s been farting gently to himself all evening. Besides, he’ll probably produce something far more eloquent in the morning than the steaming pile of pooh this book was threatening to be!


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